Taking Inventory For the Sake of My Sanity

Have a crush on a girl having a sexuality crisis. It'll be fun. "I think I'm getting gayer." Oh, isn't that nice. Do explain in simple terms for my stupid heart. "Women are cool." I, lesbian extraordinaire, completely get it. Excuse me one moment, let me just go over and crush my hope down from where it popped up. Where were we? 

In the interest of my sanity here's every good thing that's happened recently:

• I found a dress for my cousins debut! Like. 2 weeks ago. But I'm still riding the high of finding it for $8.90. Fits like a glove, but I've gotta take in the straps a little bit. My mother finds the neckline to be too low but I've got no tits so what difference does it make.
• About 60% of the way to learning the songs I need to learn for the debut. They're not really difficult, I'm just not overly enthused about learning them so I've been battling that the whole way through. The debut being in under 2 weeks is helping in that regard though. I've got a practice with my cousin this Saturday, so hopefully I've got it down by then. 
• I'm back to getting work done on projects. It's hellish, and I feel like I'm actively avoiding doing work more often than not, but progress is progress. Even if its wrenching myself onto the right path. 
• Drafted up business cards for my guitar roommate. He's been doing a lot of photography for local bands so he asked if I'd be willing to help make a simple business card. It's pretty much done and ready, I'm just waiting for some last information from him before I can finalize it, but its pretty cool! It was a quick job, but it was nice to do some non school related design. 
• Saw the Twenty One Pilots movie last Friday. I saw them on the Breach tour back in september with 2 friends. We were at the Toronto show that got cut short because of the weather. So to make up for it we got tickets for the movie concert in Imax. I was crying by the second song. It was really good. I was also lowkey falling asleep by the end because it was really late, but that didn't undermine the experience. 
• Doctors appointment is this Thursday! I'm anxious about fighting for myself and pushing my doctor enough to get him to refer me to a psychiatrist but I gotta be hopeful. This damn appointment is the thing that's kept me going for the past month. I can't half-ass this. I got scared that since I've been on the upswing that its going to be hard to convince my doctor that its been bad, but honestly the fact that it's still not Good right now is what helps. I kinda feel like crying right now just thinking about this and the imminent pressure of the project I'm working on right now. It's hard constantly yanking myself back from spiralling. Its exhausting honestly. But we're getting through, and if all goes well, we're getting help. 

One step in front of the other is what keeps the world turning.